Written May 2011

WALK A MILE IN HER SHOES

Leonard A. McHugh

It was to support the SARCC, The Sexual Assault Resource & Counseling Center of Schuylkill County. The program was named, Walk A Mile In Her Shoes, where men would wear women’s high heel shoes. Since it was to be held downtown, Pottsville, and not a very long walk, I was sure it would be an event in which I would be able to participate using a guide dog. Before I contacted SARCC, I went to the experts. I sent an email to the mailing list for Guide Dog Users, Inc. with the subject of a question for the ladies. The question was, do you ever wear high heels while working a guide dog? And explained the event. The responses were actually equally split. Half of the ladies told me no and gave several reasons why one should not, the other group gave me a lot of tips. The first one that really got my attention was No! No! No! spike heels. About ten years ago a spike heel was put through a guide dog’s foot. Other heeded advice was nothing over two inches high. High heels were described as evil and can hype up your dog. I was told that you don’t want to be drug down the street wearing very high heels. One other very valuable piece of information was to actually get out and work the dog before the event. Since my gait would be different, Toga had to learn walking with me in my new clicking shoes.

Funny, after walking in the house for a few days to try and learn how to balance with these very noisy shoes, I migrated to the back alley. Did this late at night when no one was around. My wife walked with me and could not stop from laughing. It is amazing how loud they are when you are trying to sneak around. I felt like a cat prowler in high heels.

It was quite humorous trying to find a pair of women’s shoes. I visited several shoe stores. Can only imagine the looks when I was trying on high heels. Even prior to this I posted a message on a local free cycle list looking for ladies size 9m shoes not spikes and no more than two inch heels. I also explained why I wanted them. I did not receive any offer for shoes however I did receive this very touching note:

Hi Lenny ~ How are you? I don't have any women's shoes for you, but I want to say how much I appreciate your participating in the walk. The video for this event is so wonderfully clever, I posted it wherever I could. It did my heart good to see so many men speak up and stand up for women. Years ago, my daughters and I were helped by a similar organization in another state. It was transformative and saved us. We marched in an event to raise awareness of the epidemic of violence against women, and one of the speakers said something that made my spirit sink. She said that until men of goodwill speak out, this trend will continue. I thought at the time, "Then we are forever preaching to the choir. It will never change. Men stick together. They cover for each other and never talk about this. The good guys are too mild mannered to confront this." My girls were 5 and 6 at the time and my hope for their future was dimmed. I looked at the little boys in their classes and wondered who among them would be the next generation of abusive men. Now, more than 20 years later, the day has come where real men are not just taking that stand, but are doing it in a very public, creative and positive way. That is amazing! And it's happening right here! I hope I get to meet you. I'm proud of you and very grateful. Hugs (name withheld)

Later, when I contacted the staff at the local SARCC office and told them my interest in the program they were very pleased. I made a few nice friends out there. Anyway, I decided that I would have to raise a minimum of $100 for me to humiliate myself. The first day I had $45 and one real horror story. A woman who I have only known for a few months thanked me for doing this. She then told me her tragic story. About fifteen years ago with her small kids in the house, there was a home break in and she was raped . I came out with watering eyes and decided then to do it no matter what I collected. I then met a third woman with another horrifying story who is currently using the local SARCC services. Now I was really motivated. I decided that not only will I participate but I wanted to be the highest fund raiser. I ended up being the highest fund raiser with a total of $1,354. I accomplished that in a little over three weeks.

The walk was more fun than I could ever imagine. There were a total of 95 registered walkers. Before the walk actually started there were a few speakers. They ended up mentioning the top fund raisers. I really did not think that I met my goal. So many people that I contacted told me that George Moyer, an old friend, was already there. I kept doing my best to get pledges. They announced my friend as receiving $806 in pledges. That is when I knew that I met my goal. The crowd of walkers and family supporters went wild when they said my name with a total of $1,344. I did collect another $10 after the event. There was a bag pipe player and George and I were to be right up front. I sensed that Toga, my Freedom Guide Dog was a little uncomfortable with the pipes and did not hear all of my commands so I backed off. That caused me not to get my picture in the paper with George.

At Maroon’s sports bar there was a nice party for everyone. Each registered walker received a ticket for a drink. There was a lot of food provided for everyone who walked including family supporters. Then they had three awards. One for the best poised, ugliest shoes and grand prize. I had no idea that I would win for the best poised. For the prize it was a beautiful Pandora bracelet with a charm of a woman’s high heel. Karen left me wear it for about an hour to show people. That bracelet is now hers and I know that she will always treasure it. I really must credit Freedom Guide Dogs trainer and Toga for me being poised while walking. When working Toga I am very aware of my posture. During training with my first guide my posture was corrected several times.

Now for my shoes. They were described as yellow peep toe pumps with a one and a half inch heel and a cute bow. Even before the walk some neighbor girls thought that they were very cute. My wife, Karen, did a fantastic job of dressing them up. She carefully stuck iridescent rhinestones around the shoe and on the yellow bow across the front. They looked so professional that some girls later asked me where I purchased them. Karen also took some yellow ribbon that matched Toga’s bow. She carefully tied it around my ankle then secured more iridescent rhinestones to it, making a very sparkling ankle bracelet. Sure did get a lot of complements on that piece. For Toga, I had a nice yellow bow on her harness and a sign that I made on the computer. The first line was SARCC in large red letters. The next line in a little smaller black letter was WALK A MILE;. The third line in pink was IN HER SHOES. Now since Toga was all decked out she had to have her toe nails painted and since I was wearing open toe shoes I needed to match her. Karen’s hair dresser had a suggestion and lent me some polish. It was a bright pink/red and then a top coat of a gold shimmer.

I will forever be grateful to some special friends who made some large donations. Sheila Styron, a super friend on the guide dog list that when she read what I was doing, she sent a very generous $50 donation to me for the cause. Another very special friend Rev. Marianne Unger wanted to see some pictures. When we emailed her the photos she was laughing and told me that she is sending $100 for SARCC. She went on to say that when she sees a video another $100 will be sent to Freedom Guide Dogs. I could never adequately express my thanks for her generosity and friendship. My physician, Dr. Phillip Tobash, was really laughing when I told him about me participating in the project. He then wrote a check for $100 to see me walk in women’s high heels. I received this email from another good friend, Krista Klinger:
Hi Lenny, What a great cause. I admire you and every man that takes on the challenge. You can count me in for $50.00. I'm not sure if you have the video that's out there to promote this fundraiser. See attached, it's a hoot! You may be able to use it to stir up more donations.

Talking to some of the SARCC staff members when leaving Maroon's, I told them that if I were to do this next year I could never reach that dollar amount again. I was promptly corrected with them saying that “if” is not part of that statement… Well, I now know that they are correct. While writing this I contacted George to make sure I could use his name and photograph. I did not realize that they also had teams walking. On his suggestion what would make a better team? Two old friends who were the top fund raisers for the first annual walk. Sure hope that I do not have to start looking for new shoes. I do believe that most women would not wear the same outfit to repeating events. Karen just may have to make room in her closet for my new sexy shoes. All joking aside, I am grateful to everyone who made a pledge. All of the funds that I collected will stay right here in Schuylkill County. Schuylkill County is not a very big county and has between five and six hundred reported cases every year. Also the original thought of embarrassment or humiliation very quickly changed to a wonderful sense of pride. I sure hope that my little part will help to make a difference.

Here is one final thought sent to me from Krista Klinger:
Isn't it amazing how one act (ie: your intention to try to raise $100 for the cause) has such a ripple effect? These two quotes come to mind...
“Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed people can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.” ~ Margaret Mead
Each time a man stands up for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope... and crossing each other from a million different centers of energy and daring those ripples build a current that can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance. ~Robert F. Kennedy

PHOTOGRAPHS and Videos

Here is a link to a very funny video for the introduction to the Walk A Mile In Her Shoes project. It shows men doing different things while wearing ladies high heels. There is someone out hunting, guys doing karate and generally sitting and walking around. It is quite humorous! Watch the video file on YouTube

Photograph of Lenny, wife Karen, and Freedom Guide Dog Toga.

Photograph of Lenny and friend George Moyer. George is wearing ladies size 15 red go go boots.

Photograph of Lenny’s shoes and Toga

Photograph of Lenny walking at night. Here you can really see his shoes sparkle.

To return to the previous page use your back button or click here for home page.